How I Overcome Depression

Akhir-akhir ini aku sering melihat sambatan teman-temanku tentang dunia pekerjaan melalui tweet maupun story dan bagaimana hal itu berdampak pada kondisi mental mereka :(

Shout out buat semua teman-temanku yang merasakan hal yang sama. Kita sadar bahwa lingkungan kerja kita memang sangat tidak sehat. I feel like I want to hug you guys through these distances.

As someone who struggles with mental health issues all these years, I hope I can give some tips and advices on handling stress, battling depression and living with more positive insights.

1. It's okay to cry
The first thing I rant to my psychiatrist the first time I went to counseling is that I just couldn't stop crying. She said, "It's okay". I went on and on about how I basically spent the whole day crying and she still said "It's okay. Just let it all out. Let all of your emotions be poured. After that, you'll feel better" Often times, during these phases, I would always scold myself for crying out so much. It would only cause myself to cry harder because how much I hate myself. Crying is very humane. When we were born, as babies, crying is a sign that we are alive. So, remember it that way each time you're crying. You cried because you felt something. It might be uncomfortable still, but you are alive. And it's always a blessing in one way or another.

2. Take some times off
In this period, it is really important to calm yourself. First, to accept that what you feel is valid and it's alright to feel bad about whatever things that makes you feel bad. In doing so, you must take a break, from anything that you're doing, be it work, study, or people. Go somewhere quite to clear your messy heads.

3. Do things that you love (anything that will lift up your spirits)
After that, usually came the hollow phase. I felt numb and I couldn't felt a thing. The world seems bleak and I just felt like I succumbed in the darkness. In these times, it's important to remember Dumbledore's words : "Happiness can be found, even in the darkest of times, if one only remembers to turn on the light." In this phase, it is important that you try to remember all the things that brings you joy in life, even the smallest thing. Like watching cat videos, taking a walk outside, reading poems, watching your favorite anime, etc. This will help you remember that the best things about life is usually not the biggest of acts, rather they existed in these small things.

4. Connect with your loved one
More often than not, the first thing I'd done whenever I fell into depression is shutting everyone out. Perhaps it was a bit of a habit or an automatic coping mechanism I built on my own, but later I would realize that doing that would only worsen my condition. The thing about depression is it also leads you to loneliness. You felt that you're alone in this whole wide world, you felt that you're the only one who is suffering, you felt that you're not important to all of those people outside the tiny box that trapped you. These beliefs can blind you. Please remember that you do not live in that tiny box. Remember that you live in the world where people connect to you and you to them. If you only open that box, you will find a lot of people who are trying to reach out to your hand. I know you might not find adequate colleagues in your workplace, but you still have your friends who worked together with you all these times, who faced the same problems as you did and I'm sure would willing to help you about it. Keep in touch with your loved ones, be it family or friends. Set aside some times between your hectic schedules simply to call them, ask how they're doing and just having a conversation. Remember, you are not alone.

5. Do exercise
I can't remember how many times I've ran around Tajun gede when I have depression back in 2019. And, I joined the Muay Thai club and Zumba club. Doing exercises is a really good way to boost serotonin instead of taking antidepressants. For myself personally, it's the decision that I started doing something for myself. I think it's the first step to start getting my life together again. If you cannot afford heavy exercises, you can do small yoga routines or anything else that match your energy. For me it is the thought that counts, that you're starting doing something better for yourself.

6. Meditate, journalling, eating healthily, have a good night rest
What you might felt : messy thoughts, tightness in your chest, sluggish
What you will get from doing these : the clarity of mind, the ease of the heart, feeling healthy and happy
There is nothing else I'd like more to do whenever I'm at my lowest low than to immense myself in overthinking cycle, being trapped in my own mind, binge-eating on junk food (and chose to starve some other time) and staying awake all night. These are OBVIOUSLY going to make my depression even worse. During these times, it is important to take an opposite acts on what our brains felt like doing. If you feel  like you want to start overthinking, instead take a step back and meditate to clear your mind. If you feel like you want to keep all your feelings to yourself, perhaps it's best to start pouring it out through writing, or perhaps tweet, or any way you felt comfortable expressing yourself. My own personal favorite itself is making a WhatsApp status where no one could see  It feels like talking to everyone without having the consequences lol. By writing it down or expressing it in any other way, you will observe how you really feel at that time, and the first step to feel better is by understanding how you actually feel. During the times you feel like binge-eating junk food, it will be best to consume healthy food. Binge-eating only gives you short-term satisfaction, in the long-term you will only start to resent yourself, and we don't want that. Being mindful about what you eat is actually a sign that you're having more control on yourself, this is good for relieving depression. I, myself, has start to opt for non-caffeine drinks because I realized that drinking caffeine would worsen my anxiety. Learning what food is good for you and what isn't really helps a lot in battling depression.

7. Seek professional help
I really hope that the shame of seeking mental health professionals would no longer exist. Treat this just like an ordinary illness. If you have a flu, you would go to the doctor, right? There is nothing shameful about it. If things really gets too hard, perhaps it is best that you see a professional. Taking the prescribed drugs isn't shameful either. It doesn't mean you're crazy or something.  If you have problems with access, you can find online psychology counseling. Right now, you can find online counseling services from Riliv, Soul Society Indonesia, Ibunda.id, and many more. Please make sure that you're compatible with the psychiatrist you opt for. Because without the right chemistry, it might be harder to see obvious results of therapy.

When I have depression, I always thought that the only way I can cure myself is through grand gestures like meeting with the best psychiatrist, or take the most powerful drug or something. Turns out though, it is these small steps that mattered the most. Although, I cannot say that I am 100% percent healed. There are still days when I felt so low, some days I still want to kill myself. But as I journeyed through, I found bountiful things in life that makes me feel that it is still worth living after all, despite all of those things that have brought me down. I am so lucky to be alive, and as Luffy says :